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4 Ways To Have Hot Sex After Baby

You've come to the right place if you want tips on how to have hot sex after baby!

If you’re in a partnership, intimacy (in many different forms) is a necessary component of a healthy relationship.

Sex is something you need to make time for, even if that means scheduling sexy-time on your calendar. And there’s nothing wrong with that!

Connecting with your partner sexually will enhance your relationship in other areas.

So, even though sex may seem like just another task on your to-do list, try to reframe how you think about it. It’s an investment in your relationship and in yourself.

Regardless of your body type or current state of self-love, you deserve pleasure in the bedroom! 

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Have Hot Sex After Baby

I got married 7 years ago and I’ve always heard about the 7-year itch. You know, the idea that after 7 years, your marriage will take a decline.

Well, this past weekend I had some of the hottest sex of my life…with my husband!

He scratched my 7-year itch in all the right places, even (and especially) a few he hadn’t scratched in a while. It was magical and lasted until 5:00 am (I’m still trying to catch up on sleep!). 

One of the reasons why we had such an incredibly fun (and hot!) time was because just a few days before, I had expressed some insecurities about my body.

As hard as it is to admit, I’m now about 100 pounds heavier than the first time my husband saw me naked when I was a mere 21 years old.

A lot has changed in the past 15 years.

Yet my sex drive is back to where it was when I was 21…probably even stronger. That means, while I’m wanting hot sex more than ever, there’s been that insecurity holding me back. 

When I talked to my husband about how I was feeling insecure, he stopped me mid-sentence to reassure me of how much he loves me and my body.

Hearing him tell me how much he still loves my body, with my droopy post-breastfeeding boobs and ginormous booty, was incredibly sexy! It made me feel kinda like I was that hot 20-something all over again. 

The older I become, the more I realize that communication is one of the sexiest things you can have in bed! It sure has made a difference in my marriage, creating more connections both in and out of the bedroom. 

Tips for Sex After Postpartum

Here are four tips for sex after postpartum (even if your baby is heading off to middle school)!

1. Clothing Optional

What makes you feel sexy? If it’s being naked then that’s fabulous!! We know many mamas, however, prefer to feel a little covered up.

You’d be surprised how many steals you can find on lingerie at places like Ross, TJ Maxx, and Amazon. When it comes to stockings, we can’t say enough good things about Kixies. They actually stay up!

Kix`ies Stockings
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We’re not saying you need leather and lace from head to toe, but a little bit of sexy fabric over your skin can go a very long way in making you feel super-hot!

2. Accessorize

Now that we’ve talked about clothing options, it’s time to accessorize, and we don’t mean with a strand of pearls – though they can be useful in the bedroom too!

The use of toys and erotic books are personal preferences. However, we encourage you to have an open mind because statistically 75% of women never reach orgasm from intercourse alone.

Therefore, a little buzzzzz can go a very long way and bedtime stories aren’t just for the kids!

People often become aroused when reading erotica so, if you’re struggling to get in the mood, this might be a good place to start.

Handheld Cordless Personal Wand Massager
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We also want to mention that Kegel balls can help to strengthen the muscles of the vagina, something that we mamas are often concerned about post-baby.

Stronger Kegels mean stronger orgasms and fewer incidents of peeing when you sneeze (don’t act like you don’t know what we’re talking about!) so start clenching!

3. Lube Is Love

We’re just going to say these words and get them out of the way – vaginal dryness. It’s nothing to be ashamed of and it’s super common after becoming a mother.

Our estrogen levels wax and wane throughout the motherhood journey, leading to a sometimes Sahara-like environment down there which isn’t pleasurable for anyone. Thankfully, the solution is quite easy and can be a lot of…well…fun!

Lube. Use lube. Lots and lots of lube! Think about sexy-time like a slip-and-slide because, without the slip, it’s hard to slide.

Lube Life Water-Based Personal Lubricant
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4. Express Yourself

As you read my story above, being open and honest with your partner is the key to having hot sex after baby.

We know though that doing so can leave you feeling just as vulnerable as you’d feel standing naked before them with the lights on (something else we highly recommend when you’re ready).

If finding and using your voice sounds like something you want to work on, take a deep breath, make sure the timing feels right, and start stripping down some of the emotional walls you’ve built. Share either some of your insecurities or your deepest desires or fantasies.

If you’re not feeling up to saying these things verbally, try writing them down. Be open. Be honest. And be ready to watch your sexual relationship move to a whole new level (which, we promise, will help you in other areas of your relationship as well).

When you feel sexy, have a few new tools to use, and can share your desires with your partner, hot sex after baby is totally possible!! Now you just need to be careful not to wake the kids!

I hope you found these tips helpful!

You Might Also Like: Let’s Talk About Sex: Postpartum & Plus Size Sex

Jen McLellan, CBE
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Sunday 21st of June 2020

Gosh you ladies are lucky. My hubby doesn't find me attractive anymore. After a bit of talking etc.. He now says he's sorry and does.. But I don't believe him. Sex isn't comfortable, I never O. Sexually frustrated Nd feeling ugly. I don't look good dressed up or naked. But so good to hear so many others have great supportive husbands!


Wednesday 22nd of July 2020

I'm so sorry. I hope you two are able to become close again!

Michelle Welch-Rivera

Thursday 14th of February 2019

@LB Thank you for the recommendation. As I was reading this, I was thinking about what brand of lube might work well.

Thank you so much for this post. I identify as fat and I'm absolutely a sexual being. My partner finds me crazy hot and our love life has only gotten better. Thank you for these suggestions. They are great reminders. Our little one is 4 months and I'm feeling put back together enough to have sex (finally). There's got to be more talk about sex postpartum.


Friday 15th of February 2019

You're so very welcome Michelle! I'm happy for you and congrats on your love bug! Yes, we need to be talking about postpartum sex more often.


Sunday 1st of May 2016

I'm going to make this as G rated as possible but y'all need to know about this lube I just found and LOVE. It is called Wet Platinum Strawberry flavored. It's a little pricier. But y'all. It is worth every penny. A little goes a loooong way and it doesn't have to be replenished as the sex continues (if you know what I'm saying). Oh! And it tastes delicious, too. Like a Popsicle. Lol. Really. I've tried a lot of lubes and it is simply the best. Yummy, slick and easy clean up after :)


Sunday 1st of May 2016

Thanks for the tip!! I'm going to have to look into this suggestion...TBC!